Museums, Coffee, Voiceovers, and Nixon!

Life has gotten around to being great. No, I haven't "made it" as an actor yet, but yet somehow I feel energized and ready to face the coming new year. The past two months have been molded and seem to fit my goals and dreams. While I still have a lot to accomplish, the overwhelming feeling I get is gone. While still daunting, I feel like it is something that can and will be handled.

It's been like this for the last couple of months. The new promotion at work helped desperately with my utter hatred for work, and while I don't love work, I don't mind going to work anymore which makes those forty hours of my life a lot easier to stand! It is still a means to an end, but I can enjoy it while I'm there.

The major thing is that my voiceover demo is up and ready! Yes, ladies and gentlemen, finally after many months, my demo is done and ready to be shown to the world! I'm very excited with this new step forward and plans have already formed to capitalize on it. A year ago, I would never have put this much effort into voiceovers, but seeing opportunities and potential for a career in this side of acting my focus has extended to include this side of the business. While I've already gotten work from voiceovers already, I now know that I am on my way to being able to get more opportunities to join in on this side of the business. My love for on-camera work hasn't waned, but voiceovers have become a secondary goal that I desire to achieve.

While I would never say my life has become routine, I am glad that there are some constants that have made life very enjoyable. I have my watering hole of choice, Timmy Nolan's, which has become my Cheers of sorts. Then there's the great coffee shop off Tujunga, Aroma, that gets better every time I visit. And who can leave out the Sunday football sports bar that makes waking up for football worth it? While I am still in a love/hate relationship with Los Angeles, I am beginning to collect my gems that have become a part of my life and things I would consider "homish". If this keeps up the unthinkable may happen...LA may feel like home at some point. I doubt that highly, but I can see the threads that lead to that point. While my head screams out no with that idea, I don't know if my heart is so completely against it anymore. There is still a lot I hate about LA, but the good is bleeding through.

Anyway, I was able to visit the Getty Center again yesterday and see the Carleton Watkins Dialogue Among Giants exhibit. Some of his photographs of Yosemite are awesome and I can see why his work is heralded. He has a great eye for the construction of his shots and make them quite visually interesting. I would definitely suggest visiting if you are in the area, before they close down the exhibit in the next month.

Also, I was able to see Frost/Nixon early, and I must say it was a great movie! Frank Langella did an awesome job as Nixon, even though he doesn't really look or sound like him too much but I completely believed the character. The pacing was good, and there was some good laughing moments. This is one movie that I would have paid to see, but was even more jazzed that I didn't have too! Living in this city really has it advantages some time.

Thanksgiving!

As I sat around the table last night for the Thanksgiving feast, I realized how much Burbank is starting to feel a little like home. Feeling the warmth and enjoyment of last night at the Holmes', my adopted family out here in California, I realized that they have become an important part of my life and another reason I am able to keep my sanity in Los Angeles. I'm very thankful for everything that family has done for me this past year. Kiel has been there for me through ups and downs as well as another friend to do nothing with on a weekday night. His father, Bill, has done more than I can repay this past year. He's given me so many auditions, insight into the business, and enough razzing to last a lifetime, and yet he continues to help me. I guess he enjoys trying to help Joey Starbuck make it in this town. The rest of Holmes' fill out the family nicely as well, and I am very thankful for them as well. I found myself quite content all yesterday, that though I wasn't with my folks, at least I was with my friends to celebrate food, football, and alcohol!

Storms

So at church, the pastor talked about storms. How we as humans focus so much on the storms and even hold onto the storms instead of moving on or dealing with them properly. Sometimes the storm while tumultuous can be reassuring since in this changing world they are something we can latch onto and are constant. These storms can be anything from the worst moment of your life to just small insignificant little moments that bring pain. The movie Swingers has a perfect conversation that explains it:
Rob: Sometimes it still hurts. You know how it is, man. It's like, you wake up every day and it hurts a little bit less, and then you wake up one day and it doesn't hurt at all. And the funny thing is, is that, this is kinda wierd, but it's like, it's like you almost miss that pain.
Mike: You miss the pain?
Rob: Yeah, for the same reason that you missed her... because you lived with it for so long.

Generally, I try to let the small things go...or slide. For most things, I couldn't care less about because in the scheme of things they don't matter. Fight Club talks about this and it's one of the reasons that it's my favorite movie. However, while I let most of the small stuff go, big events can be a problem. I mull it over in my brain, I try to analyze, and I replay through all my actions again and again. The problem is when I am dealing with the big stuff, it's harder for me to pass off the small events that I usually don't care about. Like today when the yogurt idiot had my car towed because he thought it wasn't an employee's car and cost me $200 to get my car out(which the landlord is going to pay for). While I would say this is more of a medium to large problem, I almost went nova. Luckily, some fellow employees calmed me down, but it was like this was going to be the outlet to let out all the pent up frustrations and emotions.

I bring up storms because even right now, I am still fuming about the car and I need to just let it go. Life is too short and too enjoyable to let that idiot ruin my day. I just have to let it go. Things I wish for I have to let go. I can't hold onto these storms anymore. Life has too much to offer.

I have to let go.

I have to let go.

Act of bravery

It is a question that sometimes haunts me and makes me look back on my life: what have I done to serve my country? Yesterday, Bush gave the Medal of Honor to Michael A. Monsoor for going above and beyond the duty and saving the life of his fellow SEALs when he dived onto a live grenade to protect his comrades. This man, and many others, have given their lives to protect and defend the rest of our nation. I benefit daily from the freedoms and opportunities that arise from being in the greatest country in the world, and yet what have I done to help it? Have I truly ever given anything back or served in a way that even remotely comes close to what our armed services do? I look back at my family and see a line from my father back of military service, and here I am in Los Angeles pursuing acting! While I love acting and I feel God has put me here, I sometimes feel that I don't come close to being a true American or patriot. I haven't had to choose between fight or flight for my country, nor felt the fear of staring at RPGs and AK-47s firing rounds at me. It's not any desire to be "brave" or "show-off", but more along the lines of giving back to my country that has given me so much. Yes, we may have our issues and bicker amongst ourselves like siblings, but there is no greater country in the world. Hands down.

Acting and all that jazz

Well, I didn't get the Speed Racer spot, but at least I had an audition. I lost it to my friend Kiel who has been doing this for a while, so it doesn't make me feel to bad. He's had a lot of practice and knows a lot of people in the industry, so there is a slight advantage on his side of the table. This totally brings out my competitive nature though, and I am determined to book one. Now it's just practice, practice, practice. Luckily, I have another voiceover audition today, so another chance to prove myself. The rejection is part of the game, and hence why I have a thick skin. I will book jobs in voiceover, and that's all there is to it.

In other news, I went to see a neurologist finally about my arm, and I am glad I did. Turns out that in my type of case if it's not treated properly there may be permanent nerve damage. That freaked me out a bit, but the doctor said I should be totally fine with the treatment I am on. I will start taking a drug and doing some rehab including some acupuncture. I am glad things are moving along.

Life is strange. Events change and can directly effect your mood. Recently, certain events have completely brought myself back around to close to normal. While not totally 100%, I am getting close and it feels good. Still am not sure what the future holds, but I push onward to find out what it looks like. Life can only get better.

Ramblings

I have no idea where I am going with this post, but I just felt like writing. It is something to take my mind off the many things beginning to weigh it down. While going slowly, I am progressing in my chosen field. I still question it sometimes, and just look at myself and think I am crazy. If I had stayed in Virginia Beach at GEICO in the motorcycle department, I would be pulling in around $55,000 or more a year. While money isn't everything, I didn't hate the job and for a while I really considered GEICO to possibly be my career. I know life would be a whole lot different than the current version. I would quite possibly have a house or at least a lot more stuff to tie me down and keep me in one spot. I know acting is my passion, and I do know that God has me out here (he has shown me that several times). I guess a part of me is just scared of the future. I really don't know what the future looks like or what it holds. There is so many avenues and alleys that it can take, that I can't really plan or guide myself like I have been able to previously. So much of my choices rely on prayer, luck, and making the most of opportunities. I have been able to make some acting contacts which may or may not help me in my quest, but you have to make the most of every opportunity. I am not discouraged, nor am I depressed, I am just weighed down by the immensity of what I am taking on. How do I keep my integrity in this business and still make a living?
I am still pushing for doing voice-over work, since it's something I definitely could do well. I used to do radio commercials back on the East Coast and I really enjoyed that and the station seemed to call me often. It would still be acting, I would be very lucky to start doing voice-overs. I might even be able to start working on video games, which of course would be awesome if I could break into that field.
Well, my car is done being worked on (she has put up with a lot, especially driving 6000 miles in less than three weeks), so it's off to go pick her up and enjoy this beautiful day in California.

Playing Ball

There is something about coming back from a game of basketball that is hard to eclipse by anything else. I, not being the most athletically gifted, still enjoy a good game of pickup. Tonight, the guys and I went to the equestrian district and got into a 5 on 5 full court game, and it was glorious. I haven't run like that in at least a year, and besides once or twice in Virginia Beach haven't played ball since high school. I don't understand what it is, but it is the camaraderie that you get on the court that I feel connected with other human beings that is on a subconscious level. Your mind is going through all the plays, motions, and decisions on what you should be doing that it can't focus on relating to the other people around you. Yet, no matter what, even if it is a group of strangers, there is a common bond that brings them together and connects them.

Maybe I am just crazy, and need to drink some more water, but I can't wait to play ball again next week.